Absolute Johannes factotum
- SCP-4088 (?)
- SCP-4088 is a living, moving black grand piano with rows of teeth lining its lid and interior. It hunts by appearing like a normal piano with an open lid, then lunging forward to slam its lid shut on large creatures, consuming them into a featureless black hole inside. This carnivorous piano is kept in a secure facility and fed a live sheep weekly. There is also SCP-4088-1, a long rope with a metal nail that, when unobserved in the same room as the piano, will suspend SCP-4088 from the ceiling, only to break and drop the piano on anyone who walks underneath, causing fatal injury. The piano is indestructible from these falls, and the rope regrows over time. SCP-4088 sometimes plays suspenseful classical music, or even attempts "Piano Man," especially when trying to lure prey or during security breaches.
- The Unsuccessful Self-Treatment of a Case of "Writer's Block" (?)
- "The Unsuccessful Self-Treatment of a Case of 'Writer's Block'" is a humorous academic article by psychologist Dennis Upper, published in 1974, which famously contains no content beyond its title, journal formatting, and a witty footnote. Recognized as possibly the shortest academic article ever, it serves as a classic example of humor in science, particularly within behavioral psychology, and has been cited over 100 times. The paper reinforces the idea of writer's block as a "blank page" and encourages brevity in writing, demonstrating that humor can be found in academic publishing.